Here we have a rare glimpse into the tortured mind of David Willis, a man so obssessed with butts there is nothing he will stop at to obtain them.
I mean look at that fucking face in panel two. I think he ran short on the straws he packed and his brain just snapped.
Oh Dave Willis, nobody cared about you in the first place.
You are about as out of touch with online politics as a pedophile is in prison.
You are a manipulator who uses the characters he draws (mostly black females and guys who don’t actually exist) to voice his unpopular, contradictory, (and in MY opinion) shitty opinions and make them SEEM right by putting in a minority to speak for you. How fucking low do you have to get to make yourself seem relevant?!
Not too mention, you wanted to make a webcomic that could succeed on it’s own, that’s how it started right? You had you own precious morality to your comic and characters. But giving how horribly you failed at it you decided to draw PORN of your oh so precious characters as a last ditch effort to retain a fanbase that is draining the quality people and living behind morons with every Social Justice comic propaganda you draw.
So no Dave Willis, YOU go fuck yourself, stop getting your Gamergate news from a tumblr blog and do some fucking research you damn assclown.se: when I think of “not your shield” I think of strawpacked as the primary justification.
When I first saw the “Guys, the ending’s going to be awesome’ comic, I knew it would be much funnier when the ending actually happened. And lo and behold.
So this storyline was that Leslie tried to hire a more diverse cast purely to spite some random dude (notice by the way that all these new hires aren’t in the final group shot, and in fact never had a line between them). This caused a hole in reality to appear for no reason, through which characters from a Captain Crunch commercial older than I am randomly appeared (again for no reason).
They are led, for no reason, by a guy in a giant robot suit called the Sogmaster, who rails against diversity as being “no threat to” his “identical white confederates”, and then ends with this page.
First off, the identical white confederates line is pure Willis, in that it’s both insultingly obvious and completely baffling due to lack of thought into the details. The soggies = white people. Got it. Except I don’t got it. Diversity is no threat to white people? Don’t 99% of social activist movements make that exact argument, and the people saying diversity is a threat to white people tend to be on Stormfront?
But, that’s one awkward line. It’s probably just a “mua-ha-ha” evil line that Willis put exactly zero thought into. It doesn’t matter compared to his story about brave diverse people standing up to white folk, in a story written by a white dude about a store run by a white dude with the final defiant line being given by a white woman protagonist, all the diverse people she hired completely forgotten, standing up against a nonhumain villain and a woman of color. No wait.
Okay, let’s not think about the politics. Willis sure as fuck didn’t. Let’s treat it as just an ending. This is clearly supposed to be a “and the adventure continues” ending. It’s the simplest ending in the world to write. Here:
Leslie: Wow, I’ve grown as a person and now I’m ready to take over the store/raise my kids/some other character arc
Malaya: Oh shit, we’re being attacked by soggies for some reason.
Leslie: *grabs nerf gun* Not on my watch.
*End credits as “Don’t Stop Believing” plays*
Instead nothing is concluded. There’s no real “this is the end of my journey” moment for Leslie, who I guess is the protagonist now. Everyone’s pretty much where they were six months ago.So, in the space that could be used doing an ending episode (The store closes down and everyone gets new jobs, for instance), we have the soggies “And so the adventure continues” for a really long time. You can’t start telling a story and then just kind of give up halfway through because you’re out of time. It means we have pages and pages and pages of the finale that are a complete fucking waste. Willis said “no half-assed filler strips” but that’s literally all we got. He just did a storyline like normal and then halfway through it canceled the comic and called it a finale. The newspost about the finale has this image
If you’ve been reading Shortpacked, you may notice that two of the three characters Willis felt represented Shortpacked the most (he signed it this year, so this isn’t an old image) have but one-panel cameos doing nothing in the final storyline.
It’s just, so lazy.
The accompanying blog post, however, contains the following gem:
I tried to use i[Shortpacked] as a tool to teach myself understanding and respect, to put myself in the brains of others.
And that’s the funniest line in the history of Shortpacked.
And to Think that some idiots actually like this comic…
Hey, another comic with the comments closed. What a tough guy Willis is.
I feel sorry for his kid when he grows up a realizes what a pussy he has for a father.
Anonymous asked:
thewebcomicsreview answered:
If Dave Willis moves on to another story now, he’s the dumbest sunovabitch in webcomics.
Assuming he wasn’t that already.
Is your son claiming that he is a wolf in a mans body? Is your daughter saying that she is a moose who is being opressed by the human society? Do you have a brother who constantly tells you about his “true boar nature”? Or maybe a friend who accuses you of discriminating him for being a lynx?
Well, worry not, my homo sapien friends! For I have the solution for your problems. Just follow these few steps and your loved ones will never again claim to be non-human entities and embrace their human side once more.
Before we start however, you will need a list of items:
Well then. Let’s begin!
Tell your otherkin friend that you accept his inhuman nature and that you wish to give him a drink or some snacks to celebrate. This little treat must be laced with the sedative. Once he or she passes out, we move on to the next step.
As the otherkin is passed out, put the blindfolds onto him/her and bind his wrists and ankles with the rope. Extra points if you hogtie him like a bull in case he claims to be one. Also keep in mind that you must strip him of any clothing, gadgets or tools. No true animal needs human inventions! Stuff him in the car and drive away miles away from any town or village and then dump him into the deepest forest or wilderness that you can find. As he is still blindfolded, you will cut him loose and put the list in his mouth before driving back home as quickly as you can.
Now we have done our part. Now we must wait for the otherkin to complete the quest that is written on the list. Here you will have written that you have given him a chanse to fully embrace his animal side and that you will not help him come back home untill he accomplishes it. He will have to live like the animal that he claims to be, achiving things that everyone of his suppsoed species are supposed to handle in their lifetimes.
For example: if he claims to be a bear, tell him that he must kill a bearcub, mate the mother, fight a rival bear with nothing but his hands and teeth, slay a moose, eat a beehive with angry bees attacking him and survive a winter by sleeping in a cave with no food or water.
Or if he claimes to be a wolf, tell him that he must start a pack of at least ten individuals, mate at least five bitches, raise a dussen pups, fight at least twelve rivaling alpha wolves of enemy packs, kill at least fifteen deers in pack hunts, and kill a farmers sheep without getting shot.
You might be thinking that the quest that you have given the otherkin is borderline suicidal. Well my dear readers…,
That’s the point.
Your otherkin friend will realise that pretending to be an animal is not so fun when you get put to task for it. He will realise that being human is actually quite luxurious and that being an animal sucks balls. Why be an animal who has to struggle for their lives every single day when you can be a human who has it easy as all hell? Or to be more precise: why be so full of shit when you can be honest?
And finally:
Not wanting to live like an animal and no longer wanting to go trough such punishment again, your friend will find his way to the nearest road, hitchhike back home and beg you to accept him back into your home. You will say that you agree to this if he stops pretending to be an animal, aka stops being an otherkin. He will without a doubt agree to your terms. If not, just repeat the same process again untill he gets the message.
And there you go. The problem is now solved. No longer do you need to sit through hours of attention-whoring and borderline insanity. And as an added bonus, the now former otherkin can now be seen as a normal member of society. You know, if you disregard the mental and physical scars that this cure gives.
I hope you enjoyed this list. Please ask away if you have any further questions.
>entire “anita sarkeesian” tag over-run with people (even some feminists) pointing out her bullshit and how she just strawmans in every video
> geekstuffandranting still desperately trying to defend her
As are aaron diaz, dave willis, linkara, and so on.
Don’t forget Angry Joe and Nostalgia Chick.
Anonymous asked:
thewebcomicsreview answered:
I feel like I’m obligated to read the last arc, but I don’t want to. I really, really don’t want to.
What a site like Patreon was made for was that people who are currently working on a project such as a webcomic, a video or video game, etc would get money by the month or after each update by fans and followers who enjoy their work and want to see more of it.
Lots of webcomic artists use Patreon or Kickstarted both good (BrawlintheFamily) and bad (Ctrl+Alt+Del). At this point so many webcomics use it that it almost seems like a requirement for a webcomic artist to have a Patreon second to advocating for social justice shit.
But that’s sort of the issue with Dobson. He’s not really a webcomic artist..anymore. He almost never makes any new art but spends all his time on Twitter retweeting Korrasami shit. He likes to blame this on his job, whatever mysterious occupation it is, but even people who work a solid 9-5 are able to make comics.
Even then the bigger question is that even if he did still make comics, would they really be worth it? Dobson’s notorious for not taking criticism even for things as basic as the fundamentals of art. For a man who spent 4 years and a few ‘k’ on getting a degree in art, he certainly isn’t putting his practice where his money is. This is coming from a guy who’s probably significantly worse than Dobson in a lot of areas because he didn’t have any training in art beyond high school. Seriously, Dobson. I got kicked out of a /co/ drawthread for sucking too much and even I can see you have some issues.
What Dobson needs to do is allot himself some time when he has to it brush up on the basics and practice his art more if he’s going to try to make money off of it. There’s plenty of good resources online and off (books) so it’s not like anyone’s asking him to retake college. He can do a few practice sketches, post them online, and have people critique them. If he’s really worried about people knowing it’s him and shitting all over him just because he’s Andrew Dobson, he should post them on the /co/ ‘work on your art’ thread anonymously.
